노팅 힐 (Notting Hill, 1999)

 

https://movie.naver.com/movie/bi/mi/basic.nhn?code=24830

https://ko.wikipedia.org/wiki/노팅힐_(영화)

 

노팅힐-영어자막.srt

노팅힐-한글자막.srt

 

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And don’t forget,
잊지 말아줘요

I’m also just a girl standing in front of a boy,
나도 한 남자 앞에 서 있는 한 여자로서

asking him to love her.
사랑해달라고 부탁한다는 걸요.

 

 

Anna, how long are you intending to stay here in Britain?
애나, 영국에 얼마나 있을 거예요?

Indefinitely.
무기한이에요.

 

---

 

[crowd chattering]

[whistling]

[Reporter] so stay with us,
because later this afternoon,
떠나지 마십시오
이따 오후에

we’re lucky enough to be
talking to Anna Scott,
애나 스콧과 얘기할
행운을 얻었으니까요

Hollywood’s biggest star by far.
할리우드 최고의 스타

Miss Scott’s latest film is once again
topping the charts…
스콧의 최신작이
다시 차트를 휩쓸고 있습니다.

[“She” playing]

[crowd applauding]

[crowd cheering]

[cheering]

[William] Of course, I’ve seen her films
and always thought she was, well, fabulous
물론 그녀의 영화를 본 적이 있고
항상 멋진 여자라고 생각했다

But, you know, a million,
million miles from the world I live in.
하지만 나와의 거리는 너무 멀다

Which is here, Notting Hill.
난 여기 노팅힐에 산다

My favorite bit of London.
런던에서 제일 좋아하는 곳

There’s the market on weekdays
selling every fruit<br/>and vegetable known to man.
Rock hard bananas, five for a pound!
The tattoo parlor with a guy outside
who got drunk and now can’t<br/>remember why he chose “I love Ken.”
The radical hairdressers, where <br/>everyone comes out looking like
the Cookie Monster,<br/>whether they want to or not.
And then, suddenly, it’s the weekend
and from break of day<br/>hundreds of stalls appear out of nowhere
filling Portobello Road,<br/>right up to Notting Hill Gate.
And wherever you look thousands<br/>of people are buying millions of antiques,
some genuine, and some<br/>not quite so genuine.
And what’s great is that lots of friends<br/>have ended up in this part of London.
That’s Tony, for example,<br/>architect turned chef
who recently invested all the money<br/>he ever earned in a new restaurant.
And so, this is where<br/>I spend my days and years,
in this small village<br/>in the middle of the city,
in a house with a blue door<br/>that my wife and I bought together
before she left me for a man<br/>who looked exactly like Harrison Ford.
And where I now lead a strange<br/>half-life with a lodger called…
Spike?
Hi.
You couldn’t help me with an incredibly<br/>important decision, could you?
Is this important<br/>in comparison to, let’s say,
whether they should cancel<br/>Third World debt?
That’s right. I’m at last going out<br/>on a date with the great Janine
and I just wanna be sure<br/>I’ve picked the right T-shirt.
-What are the choices?<br/>-Well, wait for it.
First there’s this one.<br/>Cool, huh?
Yeah, it might make it hard<br/>to strike a really romantic note.
Point taken. Don’t despair.
If it’s romance we’re looking for,<br/>I believe I have just the thing.
Yeah, well, there again, she might not<br/>think you had true love on your mind.
Right. Just one more.
True love, here I come.
Well, yeah. Yeah,<br/>that’s, that’s perfect.
Great. Thanks. Wish me luck.
Good luck.
[William] And so, it was just<br/>another hopeless Wednesday
as I walked the thousand yards<br/>through the market to work,
never suspecting that this was the day<br/>that was gonna change my life forever.
This is work, by the way,<br/>my little travel bookshop.
Morning, Martin.
Morning, Monseigneur.
Which, well, sells travel books
and to be frank with you, <br/>doesn’t always sell many of those.
Classic.
Profit from major sales push,<br/>minus £347.
Shall I go and get<br/>you a cappuccino?
You know, ease the pain a bit.
Yeah. Yeah.
Better make it a half.<br/>All I can afford.
Get your logic.<br/>Demi-cappu coming right up.
Can I help you at all?
No, thanks,<br/>I’ll just look around.
Fine.
That book’s really not great.
Just in case browsing turned to buying,<br/>you’d be wasting your money.
But if it’s Turkey you’re interested in,<br/>this one, on the other hand, is very good.
I think the man who wrote it has actually<br/>been to Turkey, which helps.
There’s also a very amusing<br/>incident with a kebab…
which is one of many<br/>amusing incidents.
Thanks, I’ll think about it.
Or, in the bigger<br/>hard-back variety, there’s…
I’m sorry,<br/>can you just give me a second?
Excuse me.
-Yes?<br/>-Bad news.
What?
We’ve got a security camera<br/>in this bit of the shop.
So?
So I saw you put that<br/>book down your trousers.
What book?
The one down your trousers.
I don’t have a book<br/>down my trousers.
Right, I tell you what,<br/>I’ll call the police
and what can I say, if I’m wrong about<br/>the whole book-down-the-trousers scenario,
I really apologize.
Okay. What if I did have<br/>a book down my trousers?
Well, ideally,<br/>when I went back to the desk
you’d remove the Cadogan Guide<br/>to Bali from your trousers
and either wipe it<br/>and put it back, or buy it.
I’ll see you in a sec.
I’m sorry about that.
No, it’s fine.
I was gonna steal one<br/>but now I’ve changed my mind.
Signed by the author, I see.
Yeah, couldn’t stop him.
If you can find an unsigned one,<br/>it’s worth an absolute fortune.
-Excuse me.<br/>-Yes?
Can I have your autograph?
-Sure.<br/>-Here.
-What’s your name?<br/>-Rufus.
What does it say?
That’s my signature, and above it,<br/>it says “Dear Rufus, you belong in jail.”
Good one.
Do you want my phone number?
Tempting, but no.
Thank you.
I will take this one.
Oh, right, right.
So, well, on second thoughts<br/>maybe it’s not that bad after all.
Actually it’s a sort of classic, really.
None of those childish kebab stories<br/>you find in so many books these days.
I tell you what, I’ll throw<br/>in one of those for free.
Useful for lighting fires, wrapping fish,<br/>that sort of thing.
-Thanks.<br/>-Pleasure.
[door closing]
Here we are. Cappuccino, as ordered.
Thanks.
I don’t think you’ll believe<br/>who was just in here.
Who? Was it someone famous?
No, no, no.
Would be exciting though, wouldn’t it,<br/>if someone famous came into the shop?
Do you know, this is pretty amazing<br/>actually, but I once saw Ringo Starr.
-Where was that?<br/>-Kensington High Street.
At least I think it was Ringo.
It might have been that man<br/>from Fiddler On The Roof.
You know, Toppy.
Topol.
Yes, that’s right. Topol.
Actually, Ringo Starr doesn’t<br/>look at all like Topol.
Yeah, but he was quite<br/>a long way away from me.
So actually it could’ve<br/>been neither of them?
Yes, I suppose so, yes.
It’s not a classic anecdote, is it?
Not a classic, no. No.
Another one?
Yes. No! Let’s go crazy.<br/>I’ll have an orange juice.
-Okay, thanks. Bye-bye.<br/>-See you later.
[both exclaiming]
-Shit! Bugger!<br/>-Oh, my God!
I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.
Here let me…
Get your hands off!
I’m really sorry.<br/>I live just over the street.
I have water and soap.<br/>You can get cleaned up.
No, thank you. I just<br/>need to get my car back.
I also have a phone.
I’m confident that in five minutes
we can have you spick and span<br/>and back on the street again.
In the non-prostitute sense,<br/>obviously.
All right.
Well, what do you mean “just over<br/>the street”? Give it to me in yards.
Eighteen yards. That’s my house there<br/>with the blue front door.
Come on in. I’ll just, I’ll just…
[mumbling]
Right. Right.
Come in. It’s not quite as tidy as it<br/>normally is, I fear.
But the bathroom’s on the top floor.<br/>And the telephone’s just up here.
Here, let me…
Round the corner,<br/>straight on, straight on up.
Bugger!
[exclaiming in disgust]
Would you like a cup of tea before you go?
No.
-Coffee?<br/>-No.
Orange juice?
Probably not.
Something else cold?
Coke? Water?
Some disgusting sugary drink
pretending to have something to do with<br/>fruits of the forest?
No.
Would you like something to eat?
Something to nibble?<br/>Apricots soaked in honey?
Quite why, no one knows,
because it stops them tasting of apricots<br/>and makes them taste like honey,
and if you wanted honey you’d<br/>just buy honey instead of apricots.
But nevertheless, there we go,<br/>they’re yours if you want them.
No.
Do you always say “no” to everything?
No.
I’d better be going.<br/>Thanks for your, uh, help.
You’re welcome.
And may I also say, um, heavenly.
I’ll just take my one chance to say it.
After you’ve read<br/>that terrible book
you’re certainly not gonna<br/>be coming back to the shop.
Thank you.
Yeah, well, my pleasure.
So…it was nice to meet you.
Surreal, but nice.
Sorry.
“Surreal, but nice.”<br/>What was I thinking?
[door bell ringing]
-Hi.<br/>-Hi.
I forgot my other bag.
Oh, right. Right.
[door shutting]
Thanks.
I’m very sorry about the<br/>”surreal, but nice” comment.
Disaster.
That’s okay.
I thought the apricot and honey thing was<br/>the real low point.
[door knob clattering]
Oh, my God. My flatmate.<br/>I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for him.
[clearing throat]
-Hi.<br/>-Hi.
I’m just going into the<br/>kitchen to get some food.
Then I’m gonna tell you<br/>a story that will
make your balls shrink<br/>to the size of raisins.
Probably best not<br/>to tell anyone about this.
Right. Right, no one.
I’ll tell myself sometimes,<br/>but, don’t worry, I won’t believe it.
-Goodbye.<br/>-Bye.
There’s something wrong with this yogurt.
It’s not yogurt.<br/>It’s mayonnaise.
Oh, right. There we are, then.
On for a videofest tonight?
I got some absolute classics.
-Smile.<br/>-No.
Smile.
I’ve got nothing to smile about.
Okay, in about seven seconds,<br/>I’m going to ask you to marry me.
Imagine… somewhere in the world<br/>there’s a man who’s allowed to kiss her.
She is… fairly fabulous.
Do you have any books by Dickens?
No.
No, I’m afraid we’re a travel bookshop.<br/>We only sell travel books.
Oh, right. How about the<br/>new John Grisham thriller?
Well, no, because that’s<br/>a novel, too, isn’t it?
Oh, right.
[sighing]
Have you got Winnie-the-Pooh?
Martin, your customer.
Can I help you?
[“Once In A Lifetime” playing]
Hey.
Hi.
Just, incidentally,<br/>why are you wearing that?
Combination of factors really.
No clean clothes…
There never will be, you know,<br/>unless you actually clean your clothes.
Right.
-Vicious circle.<br/>-Yeah.
And I was, like, rooting<br/>round in your things
and I found this and I thought, “Cool.”
Kinda spacey.
There’s something wrong<br/>with the goggles, though.
No, they were prescription.
Groovy.
So I could see all the fishes properly.
You should do more of this stuff.
So, look, any messages today?
Yeah, I wrote a couple down.
So there were two,<br/>there were two messages? Right?
You want me to write<br/>down all your messages?
Okay. Who are the ones that<br/>you didn’t write down from?
No, gone completely.
Oh, no, there was<br/>one from your mum.
She said don’t forget lunch,<br/>and her leg’s hurting again.
-No one else?<br/>-Absolutely no one else.
Though if we’re going for this obsessive<br/>writing-down-all-the-message thing,
some American girl called<br/>Anna called a few days ago.
What did she say?
Well, it was genuinely bizarre.
She said, “Hi, it’s Anna.”<br/>Then she said, “Call me at The Ritz.”
And then gave herself<br/>a completely different name.
Which was?
Absolutely no idea.
Remembering one name’s hard enough.
No, I know that. She said that.<br/>I know she’s using another name.
The problem is she left<br/>the message with my flatmate,
which was a very<br/>serious mistake.
Imagine, if you will, the stupidest person<br/>you’ve ever met.
Are you doing that?
Yes, sir, I have him in my mind.
And now double it.
And that is the, what can I say, the git<br/>that I am living with.
And he can’t<br/>remember this other…
Try Flintstone.
Sorry. What?
I think she said<br/>her name was Flintstone.
I don’t suppose Flintstone<br/>rings any bells, does it?
I’ll put you right through, sir.
Oh, my God.
Hello. Hi.
Hi.
Hi. Sorry.<br/>It’s William Thacker.
-[Anna] Yes?<br/>-We… I work in a bookshop.
You played it pretty cool there,<br/>waiting for three days to call.
Oh, no, I promise you I’ve never played<br/>anything cool in my entire life.
My flatmate, who I’ll stab to death later,<br/>never gave me the message.
I don’t know, perhaps…
I could drop round for tea later<br/>or something?
Things are pretty busy here.<br/>I might be free around 4:00.
Right. Right. Great.
Bye.
Classic.
Classic.
[piano playing]
-Which floor?<br/>-Three, please.
[elevator bell dinging]
Are you sure?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure.
Hi. Hi. I’m Karen. I’m sorry,<br/>things are running a little bit late.
Here’s the thing.<br/>Do you wanna come this way?
Through here.
So what did you think of the film?
Yeah, I thought it was fantastic.
I thought it was Close Encounters<br/>meets Jean de Florette.
I agree.
I’m sorry, I didn’t get down<br/>what magazines you’re from.
Time Out.
Great.
And you’re from?
Horse &amp; Hound.
The name’s William Thacker.<br/>Actually, she might be expecting me.
Oh, okay. Take a seat and I’ll go check.
I see you’ve… I see you’ve<br/>brought her some flowers.
[laughing]
No. These are for my grandmother.
She’s in a hospital down the road.
Thought I’d kill two birds<br/>with one stone, you know.
Sure, right. Absolutely, yeah.
Which hospital’s that?
Do you mind me not saying?<br/>It’s a rather distressing thing, isn’t it?
Name of the hospital<br/>kind of gives it away.
-Absolutely. Sure.<br/>-Cheers.
Right. Mr. Thacker,<br/>if you come this way.
Right.
You’ve got five minutes.

-Hi.
-Hello.
– 안녕하세요.
– 안녕하세요.

I brought these, but clearly…
꽃을 가져왔는데, 이건…

No, they’re great. They’re great.
아니, 좋네요.

I’m sorry about not ringing back.
전화 바로 못 해서 미안해요

The whole “two names” concept
이름을 두 개 남긴다는 건

was totally too much for my
flatmate’s pea-sized intellect.
제 친구 새대가리로는
접수가 안 되는 거였어요.

No, it’s a stupid privacy thing.
I always pick a cartoon character.
아뇨, 한심한 사생활이에요.
전 항상 만화 캐릭터 이름을 써요.

Last time I was Mrs. Bambi.
전에는 밤비 부인이었죠.

[door closing]

Everything all right?
별일 없어요?

Yes, thank you.
예, 고마워요

And you’re from Horse & Hound?
‘말과 사냥개’ 기자분이시죠?

Good.
좋군요

Is that so?
그래요?

So…
그러면

I’ll just fire away, then, shall I?
이제 질문해도 될까요?

Right.
좋아요

The film’s great,
영화는 훌륭해요

and I just was wondering whether
그 영화에 말을 더 투입하면

you ever thought of having
more, uh, horses in it?
좋겠다는 생각을
해본 적이 있으신가 궁금해요

[clearing throat]

Well, we would have liked to,
그랬으면 좋았겠죠

but it was difficult,
obviously, being set in space.
하지만 어려웠어요
우주가 배경이다 보니

Space, right, yeah.
Yeah, obviously very difficult.
그렇군요
우주에서는 어려웠겠죠

I’m so sorry.
미안해요

I arrived outside,
they thrust this thing into my hand.
밖에서 이걸 주던데요

No, it’s my fault. I thought this would
all be over by now.
아니, 제 잘못이에요
지금쯤이면 끝날 줄 알았거든요

I just wanted to sort of
apologize for the kissing thing.
키스한 걸 사과하고 싶었어요

I seriously don’t know
what came over me.
제가 잠깐 정신이 나갔었나 봐요

I just wanted to make sure
that you were fine about it.
그 때문에 마음 상하지 않았는지
확인하고 싶었어요

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
absolutely fine.
그럼요, 괜찮아요

[door closing]

Do remember that Miss Scott is also
keen to talk about her next project
스콧 씨는 다음 프로젝트 얘기를
하고 싶어 하세요

which she is shooting later in the summer.
여름에 찍을 계획이죠

Yes, excellent. Excellent.
그래요, 좋습니다

Any horses in that one?
거기엔 말이 나오나요?

Or hounds for that matter? Our readers
are equally intrigued by both species.
아니면 사냥개는요?
우리 독자들은 둘 다 좋아하거든요

It takes place on a submarine.
잠수함이 배경이에요

Well, bad luck.
저런, 운이 안 좋군요

But if there were horses in it,
하지만 만약 말이 나온다면

would you be riding them, or would you
be getting a stunt-horse-double-man-thing?
직접 말을 타실 건가요
아니면 스턴트맨을 쓸 건가요?

[sighing]

I’m a complete moron. I apologize.
이런 멍청이 같으니
미안해요

This is very weird.
정말 묘한 일이네요

It’s the sort of thing that happens
in dreams, not in real life.
이건 꿈에서나 있는 일이지

I mean, good dreams.
It’s a dream, in fact, to see you again.
다시 만나다니 정말 꿈이 맞네요

What happens next in the dream?
꿈에서 다음엔
무슨 일이 일어나죠?

I suppose that in the dream,
“dream scenario,”
꿈속에서, ‘꿈속 시나리오’에서

I just change my personality,
제 성격을 바꿀 것 같아요

because you can do that in dreams
꿈속에서는 그럴 수 있잖아요

and walk over and kiss the girl. But…
여자에게 걸어가 키스하고…

[DOOR OPENING]

Time’s up, I’m afraid.
Did you get what you wanted?
죄송하지만 시간 됐습니다
다 하셨나요?

Nearly, nearly.
거의 다 됐어요

Well, maybe just one last question.
그럼 마지막 질문이에요

Sure.
그래요

Right, right.
알았어요

[door closing]

Are you busy tonight?
오늘 밤에 바쁘세요?

Yes.
예

Right. Right.
그렇군요

Come in.
Well, it was nice to meet you.
Yes, and you.
Surreal, but nice.
Thank you.
You are Horse &amp; Hound’s favorite actress.
You and Black Beauty tied.
Hang on, don’t go.<br/>How was she?
Oh. Um…
-Fabulous.<br/>-Excellent.
Wait a minute, she took your<br/>grandmother’s flowers.
Yeah, yeah.<br/>That’s right. Bitch.
Mr. Thacker.<br/>If you’d like to come with me,
we can just rush you through the others.
The others?
Mr. Thacker is<br/>from Horse &amp; Hound.
How’s it going?
Very well. Thank you.
Have a seat.
Well, did you enjoy the film?
Yes. Enormously.
-Well, fire away.<br/>-Right.
Did you enjoy making the film?
Yes, I did.
Good.
Any bit in particular?
You tell me what<br/>”bit” you enjoyed the most
and I’ll tell you if I enjoyed<br/>making that “bit.”
[stuttering]
I… liked the bit in space.
Very much.
Did you identify with<br/>the character you’re playing?
[speaking Spanish]
No.
No.
Oh.
Why not?
[speaking Spanish]
Because he’s playing a psychopathic<br/>flesh-eating robot.
Classic.
So, is this your first film?
No, it’s my 22nd.
Of course, it is.
Any favorites among the 22?
Working with Leonardo.
Da Vinci?
-DiCaprio.<br/>-Of course.
[chuckling]
And is he your favorite Italian director?
[people chattering]
-Mr. Thacker?<br/>-Oh, no.
-Have you got a minute?<br/>-No.
Hi.
Hi.
Yeah, so, the, um…
The thing I was doing tonight<br/>I’m not doing anymore.
I told them I had to<br/>spend the evening with
Britain’s premiere<br/>equestrian journalist.
Oh.
Well, great. Fantastic.
Shittity brickity.<br/>It’s my sister’s birthday. Shit.
We’re meant to be having dinner.
Okay, that’s fine.
No, I’m sure I can get out of it.
No, I mean, if it’s fine with you,<br/>I’ll be your date.
You’ll be my date to my little<br/>sister’s birthday party?
If it’s all right.
Well, yeah, I’m sure it’s all right.
My friend Max is cooking
and he is generally acknowledged to be<br/>the worst cook in the world,
but you could hide the food<br/>in your handbag or something.
Okay.
Okay.
He’s bringing a girl?
Miracles do happen.
Does the girl have a name?
Don’t know, wouldn’t say.
Oh, Christ! What is going on in there?
[door bell ringing]
Oh, God!
Hi, come on in. Vague food crisis.
Hiya.
Sorry, the guinea-fowl is proving<br/>more complicated than expected.
He’s cooking guinea-fowl?
Don’t even ask.
-Hi.<br/>-Hi.
Good Lord, you’re the spitting image of…
Bella, this is Anna.
-Right.<br/>-Okay, crisis over.
Max, this is Anna.
Hi.
Hello, Anna… Scott.
-Have some wine.<br/>-Thank you.
[door bell ringing]
I’ll get it.
Red or white?
-Hi.<br/>-Hi.
Oh, yes, happy birthday.
Thank you.
Look, your brother’s brought this girl…
Hi, guys.
Holy fuck!
Honey, this is Anna. Anna, this is Honey.<br/>She’s my baby sister.
-Hi.<br/>-Oh, God.
This is one of those key moments in life<br/>when it’s possible
you can be really genuinely cool<br/>and I’m going to fail just 100%.
I absolutely, totally<br/>and utterly adore you.
And I just think you are the most<br/>beautiful woman in the world.
And more importantly, I genuinely believe,
and I’ve believed for some time now,<br/>that we could be best friends.
So what do you think?
Uh…
Lucky me.
[clearing throat]
Happy birthday.
Oh, you gave me a present.
We’re best friends already, then.
Marry Will, he’s a really nice guy,<br/>then we can be sisters.
I’ll think about it.
[door bell ringing]
That’ll be Bernie.
-Hi.<br/>-Hi. Sorry I’m late.
Bollocksed up at work again, I fear.
Millions down the drain.
Well done.
Bernie, this is Anna.
Hello, Anna.<br/>Delighted to meet you.
And you.
Honey bunny,<br/>happy birthday to you.
-Hi, Bella.<br/>-Hi.
It’s a hat. You don’t have<br/>to wear it or anything.
-Hi, Will.<br/>-Hi.
Hi.
-Hi.<br/>-What?
Wine, Bernie?
You haven’t slept with her, have you?
That is a cheap question<br/>and the answer is, of course, no comment.
-No comment means “yes.”<br/>-No, it doesn’t.
-Do you ever masturbate?<br/>-Definitely no comment.
You see, it means “yes.”
[laughing]
So, tell me, Anna, what do you do?
-I’m an actress.<br/>-Oh, splendid.
What do you do?
I’m actually in the<br/>stock market myself.
So… not really similar fields.
Though I have done<br/>the odd bit of amateur stuff.
P. G. Wodehouse.<br/>Farce, all that, you know.
“Careful there, vicar.”
[chuckling]
Always imagined it’s a pretty<br/>tough job, though, acting.
I mean, the wages are<br/>a scandal, aren’t they?
They can be.
I see friends from university,<br/>clever chaps,
been in the business longer than you.
They’re scraping by on seven,<br/>eight thousand a year.
It’s no life.
What sort of acting do you do?
Films mainly.
Oh, splendid. Oh, well done.<br/>How’s the pay in movies?
I mean, last film you did,<br/>what did you get paid?
$15 million.
Right.
So that’s… Well, fairly good.
Right, I think we’re ready.
Bella, can you tell me<br/>where I can find…
Oh, sorry, yeah, yeah.<br/>It’s down the corridor on the right.
I’ll show you. I’ll show you.
Quickly, quickly, quickly.<br/>Talk very quickly.
What are you doing<br/>here with Anna Scott?
-Anna Scott? What, the film star?<br/>-Yes. Shut up.
Shh.
-Oh, God!<br/>-What?
Oh, God. Oh, goddy God.
What did you say to her?
I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it.<br/>I actually walked into the loo with her.
I was still chatting when she<br/>started unbuttoning her jeans.
She had to ask me to leave.
Oh, God.
So you knew who she was?
Of course I did, but he didn’t!
Well, not instantly,<br/>but I got away with it though.
[chatting]
What do you think of the guinea-fowl?
I’m a vegetarian.
Oh, God.
So, how’s the guinea-fowl?
Best guinea-fowl I’ve ever tasted.
[“When You Say Nothing At All”<br/>playing]
[Bella laughing]
[clapping]
[crackers popping]
[all shouting]
Having you here, Anna, firmly<br/>establishes what I’ve long suspected,
that we really are the most desperate<br/>lot of under-achievers.
[William] Shame.
I’m not saying it’s a bad thing.
In fact, I think it’s something we should<br/>take pride in.
I’m gonna give the last brownie<br/>as a prize to the saddest act here.
Bern.
[all laughing]
Well, obviously it’s me, isn’t it?
I mean, I work in the city<br/>in a job I don’t understand
and everyone keeps<br/>getting promoted above me.
I haven’t had a girlfriend<br/>since, well, since puberty.
And nobody fancies me.
And if these cheeks get<br/>any chubbier, they never will.
Nonsense. I fancy you.
-Really?<br/>-[Honey] Yeah.
Or I did before you got so fat.
[Max] You see.
And unless I’m much mistaken, your job<br/>still pays you rather a lot of money,
whilst Honey here earns 20 pence a week
flogging her guts out in London’s worst<br/>record store.
Yes!
And I haven’t got hair, I’ve got feathers.
And I’ve got funny goggly eyes<br/>and I’m attracted to cruel men.
Actually, no one will marry me,
because my boosies have actually<br/>started shrinking.
[Max] You see, it’s incredibly sad.
Yeah, but on the other hand<br/>her best friend is Anna Scott.
That’s true, I can’t deny it.<br/>She needs me. What can I say?
[all laughing]
And most of her limbs work, whereas<br/>I’m stuck in this thing day and night,
in a house full of ramps.
And to add insult to serious injury,
I’ve totally given up smoking,<br/>my favorite thing.
And, um…
Well, the truth is,<br/>we can’t have a baby.
[William] Oh, Belle…
[sighing]
C’est la vie.
Still, we’re lucky in lots of ways.
But, surely that’s worth a brownie.
Well, I don’t know.
Look at William.
Very unsuccessful professionally.
-That’s true.<br/>-Divorced.
Used to be handsome, now kind of squidgy<br/>round the edges.
[all laughing]
And absolutely certain<br/>never to hear from Anna again
once she’s heard that his<br/>nickname at school was Floppy.
You did. I can’t believe it, you did.
Thanks very much. Thank you.
Well at least I get<br/>the last brownie, right?
[Max] I think so, yes.
Well, wait, what about me?
I’m sorry?
You think you deserve the brownie?
Well, a shot at it at least, huh?
Right, well, you’ll have to prove it.
I mean, this is a very, very good brownie<br/>and I’m gonna fight for it.
I’ve been on a diet<br/>every day since I was 19,
which basically means<br/>I’ve been hungry for a decade.
I’ve had a series of not nice boyfriends,<br/>one of whom hit me.
And every time<br/>I get my heart broken,
the newspapers splash it about<br/>as though it’s entertainment.
And it’s taken two rather painful<br/>operations to get me looking like this.
-Really?<br/>-Really.
And one day, not long from now,
my looks will go,<br/>they will discover I can’t act,
and I will become some sad,<br/>middle-aged woman who
looks a bit like someone<br/>who was famous for a while.
No, nice try, gorgeous,<br/>but you don’t fool anyone.
[all laughing]
Pathetic effort<br/>to hog the brownie.
Thank you for such<br/>a terrific time.
I’m delighted.
That’s a great tie.
Now you’re lying.
Okay, it’s true. I told you<br/>I was bad at acting.
It was lovely to meet you.
Yeah. And you.
I’ll wait until you’ve gone<br/>before I tell him you’re a vegetarian.
No!
Goodnight.
I’m sorry about the loo thing.
I meant to leave, but I just…
Look, ring me if you want<br/>someone to go shopping with.
I know lots of nice,<br/>cheap places.
I mean, not that<br/>money is necessarily…
It was just so<br/>nice to meet you.
-Happy birthday.<br/>-Thank you.
You’re my style guru.
Sorry, can I just…
Thanks.
Leave her.
[Anna] Goodnight, everyone.
[William] Max, Belle, we’ll see<br/>you in a couple of days.
-[Bella] Bye, guys.<br/>-Bye, Anna.
Love your work.
-[William] Goodnight.<br/>-Goodnight.
[all screaming]
Sorry. They always do that<br/>when I leave the house.
It’s a stupid thing.<br/>I hate it.
Floppy, huh?
It’s the hair.<br/>It’s to do with the hair.
Why is she in a wheelchair?
Because she had an accident<br/>about 18 months ago.
And the pregnancy thing,<br/>is that to do with the accident?
You know, I’m not sure.
I don’t think they tried for kids before,<br/>as fate would have it.
Do you want to…
My place is just…
Too complicated.
That’s fine.
Busy tomorrow?
I thought you were leaving tomorrow.
I was.
All these streets round here
have these mysterious communal<br/>gardens in the middle of them.
They’re like little villages.
Let’s go in.
No, that’s the point.<br/>They’re private villages.
Only the people who live round<br/>the edges are allowed in.
You abide by rules like that?
I don’t, no, no,<br/>but others do.
And I just do what I want.
Right.
[GRUNTING]
Whoopsidaisies.
[laughing]
What did you say?
-Nothing.<br/>-Yes, you did.
No, I didn’t.
You said “whoopsidaisies.”
No one says “whoopsidaisies,”<br/>do they? I mean, unless they’re…
There is no “unless.”
Because no one has said<br/>”whoopsidaisies” for 50 years.
And even then it was just little girls<br/>with blonde ringlets.
Exactly. Right.
So here we go again.
[grunting]
[exclaiming]
Whoopsidaisies.
[laughing]
Yeah, well, it’s a disease.<br/>It’s a clinical thing.
I’m taking pills and having injections.<br/>And I’m told it won’t last long so…
Okay, stand aside.
I don’t think<br/>that’s a good idea.
Really, it’s quite tricky.<br/>Anna…
Anna, don’t, it’s harder than it…<br/>No, it’s not. It’s easy.
Come on, Flopsy.
Right. Right!
Oh, bugger.
Oh, God. This could be very unpleasant.
[groaning]
Bugger, bugger.
[“When You Say Nothing At All”<br/>playing]
Now what in the world in this garden<br/>could make that ordeal worthwhile?
Nice garden.
[Anna laughing]
“For June who loved this garden, from<br/>Joseph who always sat beside her.”
Some people do spend<br/>their whole lives together.
Come and sit with me.
Bollocks. Bollocks. Bollocks!
Have you seen my glasses?
No, afraid not.
Big, big bollocks!
Average day, my glasses are everywhere.
Everywhere I look<br/>there’s a pair of glasses.
But when I want to go to<br/>the cinema they’ve vanished.
It’s one of life’s real cruelties.
That’s compared to, like, earthquakes in<br/>the Far East or testicular cancer, is it?
Oh, shit, is that the time?
Thanks for all your help<br/>on the glasses thing.
Oh, you’re welcome.<br/>Did you find them?
-Sort of.<br/>-Great.
So who left who?
She left me.
Why?
She saw through me.
Uh-oh.
That’s not good.
You can give me Anna Scott any day.
I didn’t like her last film. Fell asleep<br/>as soon as the lights went down.
I don’t really care what the film’s like.
Any film with her in, it’s fine by me.
[all laughing]
[man] She’s not my type at all.<br/>I prefer that other one.
You know, blonde, sweet looking.
You know, what’s her name?
Has an orgasm every time you take<br/>her out for a cup of coffee.
Meg Ryan.
No, she’s too wholesome.
You see, the point about Miss Scott<br/>is she’s got that twinkle in her eye.
Probably drug-induced. Spends most<br/>of her life in bloody rehab.
Well, whatever.<br/>She’s so clearly up for it.
I mean, you see, most girls,<br/>they’re all like, “Stay away, chum.”
But, Anna…<br/>She is absolutely gagging for it.
Do you know that in over 50% of languages
the word for “actress” is the same<br/>as the word for “prostitute”?
[man] Where did you get that from?
[all laughing]
And Anna is your definitive actress,
someone really filthy you can just<br/>flip over and start again.
Right, that’s it. Sorry.
No, no.<br/>There’s really no point.
[laughing]
Sorry, sorry to disturb you guys, but…
-Can I help?<br/>-Well, yeah.
I wish I hadn’t overheard your<br/>conversation, but I did.
And, I just think, you know the person<br/>you’re talking about is a real person
and I think she probably deserves<br/>a little bit more consideration
rather than having jerks<br/>like you drooling over her.
Oh, sod off, mate.<br/>What are you, her dad?
[all laughing]
-I’m sorry.<br/>-No, I love that you tried.
Time was I’d have done<br/>the same thing. In fact…
Hi.
Oh, my God!
I just wanted to apologize for my friend.<br/>He’s very sensitive.
No, no, no, leave it. I’m sure you<br/>didn’t mean any harm.
I’m sure it was<br/>just friendly banter.
I’m sure you guys have<br/>dicks the size of peanuts.
Enjoy your dinner.<br/>The tuna’s really good.
[Anna] I shouldn’t have done that.<br/>I shouldn’t have done that.
No, you were brilliant.
I’m rash and I am stupid.
What am I doing with you?
I don’t know, I’m afraid.
I don’t either.
Here we are.
Yes.
Do you wanna come up?
Well, there seems to be lots<br/>of reasons why I shouldn’t, so…
There are lots of reasons.
Do you wanna come up?
Give me five minutes?
-Hi.<br/>-Hi.
To be able to do that<br/>is such a wonderful thing.
-You’ve got to go.<br/>-Why?
Because my boyfriend, who was in America,<br/>is, in fact, now in the next room.
-Boyfriend?<br/>-Yes.
Hey, baby, who is it?
[Anna] It’s…
[stuttering]
Room service.
Oh. How are you doing?
I thought you guys always<br/>wore those penguin coats?
Usually we do.
But I was just<br/>changed to go home.
And then I thought<br/>I’d take this final call.
Oh, great. If you don’t mind,<br/>I would like something, too.
Could you bring me up some<br/>really, really cold water?
I’ll see what I can do.
Still, not sparkling.
Absolutely.<br/>Ice-cold still water.
Unless, of course,<br/>it’s illegal in the UK
to serve beverages<br/>below room temperature.
I wouldn’t want you going<br/>to jail just to satisfy my whim, now.
-I’m sure it’s fine.<br/>-Thank you.
Hey, one more thing,<br/>if you don’t mind,
could you adiós these dirty dishes<br/>and take out that trash, too?
Right.
No. No. Don’t do that.
I don’t think it’s his job to clear.
Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.<br/>What’s your name, man?
Bernie.
Oh, listen, Bernie, thank you,<br/>I really appreciate it.
Hey, you…
[moaning]
So, tell me, tell me, tell me.<br/>Good surprise or nasty surprise?
Good surprise.
Oh, you’re such a liar.<br/>She hates surprises.
Hey, what are you gonna order?
From him.<br/>What are you gonna order?
I haven’t decided yet.
Well, don’t overdo it.
I don’t want people saying,
“There goes that famous actor<br/>with the big fat girlfriend.”
I should leave.
This is a fairly strange<br/>reality to be faced with.
I’m so sorry.
I don’t know what to say.
I think “goodbye” is traditional.
[How Can You Mend<br/>A Broken Heart” playing]
Come on. Open up.
This is me.
Spikey.
[chuckling]
I’m in contact with some<br/>quite important spiritual vibrations.
Come on. Hit me with it.
There’s this girl.
Aha!
See, I’d been getting a female vibe. Good.
Speak on, dear friend.
She’s someone who can’t be mine,
and it’s as if I’ve taken “love heroin”<br/>and now I can’t ever have it again.
I’ve opened Pandora’s Box<br/>and there’s this trouble inside.
Hmm.
Yeah.
Tricky.
Tricky.
I knew a girl at school called Pandora.
Never got to see her box though.
Right.
Right, thanks, that’s very helpful.
You didn’t know she had a boyfriend?
No. No. Why, did you?
[William] Oh, bloody hell,<br/>I don’t believe it.
My whole life ruined because<br/>I don’t read Hello! magazine.
Let’s face facts. This was<br/>always a no-win situation.
Anna’s a goddess.
You know what happens to mortals who get<br/>involved with the gods.
Buggered, is it?
Every time.
But don’t despair, I think I have<br/>the solution to your problems.
Really?
Her name is Tessa, and she works<br/>in the contracts department.
The hair, I admit,<br/>is unfashionably frizzy.
But she’s bright as a button, and kisses<br/>like a nymphomaniac on death row.
Apparently.
[door bell ringing]
Now, try.
[Tessa] I got completely lost.<br/>It’s real difficult, isn’t it?
Everything’s got the<br/>word Kensington in it.
Kensington Park Road.<br/>Kensington Gardens.
Kensington bloody<br/>Park Gardens.
Look, Tessa,<br/>this is Bella, my wife.
Hello. You’re in a wheelchair.
Yeah, that’s right.
And this is William.
-Hello, William.<br/>-Hi.
Max has told me everything about you.
Has he?
Oh, yes.<br/>You are a naughty boy.
-Wine?<br/>-Oh, yes, please.
Come on, Willie,<br/>let’s get sloshed.
Red or white?
Red.
Keziah…
Some woodcock?
No, thank you,<br/>I’m a fruitarian.
What is a fruitarian exactly?
Well, we believe that fruits<br/>and vegetables have feelings,
so we think cooking is cruel.
We only eat things that have<br/>actually fallen from the tree or bush.
That are, in fact,<br/>dead already.
Oh, right.
Right.
So, these carrots…
Have been murdered, yes.
Murdered?
Gosh, poor old carrots.<br/>That’s beastly.
Delicious coffee.
I’m sorry about the lamb.
No, I thought it was really,<br/>you know, interesting.
“Interesting” means<br/>”inedible.”
Really inedible,<br/>yes, you’re right.
[laughing]
Well, maybe we’ll meet again.
Yeah. Yeah. That’ll be great.
Bye.
Well?
Perfect. Absolutely perfect.
And?
You see, I think you’ve forgotten<br/>what an unusual situation you two have.
To find someone<br/>you actually love,
who’ll love you, I mean,<br/>the chances are always minuscule.
Look at me.<br/>Apart from the American,
I’ve only loved two girls,<br/>both total disasters.
-That’s not fair.<br/>-No, really.
One of them marries me then leaves me<br/>faster than you can say “Indiana Jones.”
And the other, who seriously<br/>ought to have known better,
casually marries<br/>my best friend.
She still loves you though.
Yeah, in a depressingly<br/>asexual way.
I never fancied<br/>you much, actually.
[Max giggling]
Oh, God.
I loved you, you were terribly funny,<br/>but all that kissing my ears…
I don’t believe it.<br/>This is just getting worse.
I shall find myself 30 years from now<br/>still sitting on this sofa.
Do you wanna stay?
Yeah, why not.
All that awaits me at home<br/>is a masturbating Welshman.
Here we go.
Goodnight.
Night.
[laughing]
[speaking indistinctly]
See you, Will.
Right. Right.
Guilty. Very, very guilty.
So it seems.
[door bell ringing]
Hi.
Can I come in?
Come in.
They were taken years ago.
I know it was…
But I was poor<br/>and it happens a lot.
That’s not an excuse.<br/>I just…
But to make matters worse,<br/>it now appears as though
someone was filming<br/>me as well.
So what was a stupid photo shoot now<br/>looks like a porn film.
And the pictures have been sold,<br/>and they’re just everywhere.
I didn’t know where to go.
The hotel’s surrounded.
I know it’s been months, but…
This is the place.
Thank you.
I’m just in London for two days,<br/>but what with your papers,
it’s the worst place to be.
I mean, these pictures are just<br/>so horrible and they’re so grainy.
And it makes me look like…
Listen, don’t think about it.
We’ll sort it out.
Now what would you like?
Tea? Bath?
Yeah.
A bath would be great.
[door closing]
Oh, Christ alive!
Brilliant. Fantastic.
Magnificent.
You must be Spike.
Hi.
Just checking.
Thank you, God.
I’m really sorry<br/>about last time.
I mean, he just flew in.<br/>I had no idea.
In fact, I had no idea if he<br/>was ever gonna fly in again.
Listen, it’s not often<br/>one has the opportunity to
adiós the plates of<br/>a major Hollywood film star.
It was thrilling for me.
So how is he?
I don’t know.
It just got to the point<br/>where I couldn’t remember
any of the reasons<br/>why we were together.
And you and love?
Oh, well, there’s a question<br/>without an interesting answer.
I have thought about you.
It’s just that any time I’ve tried to keep
anything normal<br/>with a person that was normal,
it’s just been a disaster.
Yeah, no, listen,<br/>I appreciate that, absolutely.
So what is that,<br/>a film you’re doing?
I start in LA on Tuesday.
Would you like me to<br/>take you through your lines?
Would you? Because it’s<br/>all talk, talk, talk.
Come on, hand it over. Right.
Basic plot?
I’m a difficult but brilliant junior<br/>officer, who in about 20 minutes
is gonna save the world<br/>from nuclear disaster.
Okay, well done, you.
“Message from Command,<br/>would you like them to send in the HK’s?”
No. Turn over four TRS’s
and tell them we need radar<br/>feedback before the KFT’s return at 19:00.
Then inform the Pentagon<br/>we need Black Star cover
from 10:00 through 12:15.
And if you say one word about
how many mistakes I made in<br/>that speech, I’ll pelt you with olives.
“Very well, Captain, I’ll pass that on,<br/>straight away.”
Thank you.<br/>How many mistakes did I make?
Eleven.
Dammit. And, Wainwright…
Cartwright.
Cartwright, Wainwright,<br/>whatever your name is…
I promised little Jimmy<br/>I’d be home for his birthday,
so could you get a message to him<br/>that I may be a little late?
“Certainly.”<br/>And little Johnny?
-My son’s name is Johnny?<br/>-Yeah.
Well, then get<br/>a message to him, too.
“I’ll do what I can, Captain,<br/>but I can’t promise anything.”
And, Cartwright goes.
[sighing]
What do you think?
Gripping. You know,<br/>it’s not Jane Austen.
It’s not Henry James.<br/>But it’s gripping.
Think I should do<br/>Henry James instead?
Well, I think you would be<br/>brilliant in Henry James.
But, you know, this writer… Writers…
They’re pretty damn good, too.
Well, you never get anyone<br/>in Wings of the Dove saying,
“Inform the Pentagon,<br/>we need Black Star cover.”
Well, and for me,<br/>the book is the poorer for it.
I can’t believe you<br/>have that picture.
You like Chagall?
I do.
It feels like how love should be.
Floating through a dark blue sky.
With a goat, playing a violin.
Well, yes.
Happiness isn’t happiness<br/>without a violin-playing goat.
You have big feet.
Yes. Yes, always have had.
You know what they say<br/>about men with big feet?
No, I don’t know. What’s that?
Big feet, large shoes.
The thing that’s so irritating is that now
I’m so totally fierce when<br/>it comes to nudity clauses.
You actually have clauses<br/>in your contract about nudity?
Definitely.
You may show the dent of the top of<br/>the artist’s buttocks but neither cheek.
Or, if there’s a stunt bottom being used,<br/>artist must have full consultation.
You have a stunt bottom?
Well, I could have a stunt bottom, yes.
And are people tempted to go<br/>for better bottoms than their own?
Yeah. I mean, I would.<br/>This is important stuff.
Well, it’s one hell of a job, isn’t it?<br/>I mean, what do you put on your passport?
Profession.<br/>Mel Gibson’s bottom.
Actually, Mel does his own ass work.
Right.
Why wouldn’t he?
Absolutely.
It’s delicious.
What, the ice cream<br/>or Mel Gibson’s bottom?
Both. Equally.
But you wouldn’t<br/>necessarily lick both?
Well, this is tart.
And fuzz free.
And… The bedroom,<br/>I’ve put clean sheets on.
Today’s been a good day.
Which in the circumstances is unexpected.
Thank you.
Anyway, time for bed.
Or, sofa bed.
Goodnight.
Goodnight.
[sighing]
[stairs creaking]
Oh, my God.
Hello?
Hello.
Spike?
I wonder if I could have a little word?
Right.
I don’t want to interfere or nothing,
but she’s just split up from<br/>her boyfriend. That’s right, innit?
Maybe.
And she’s in your house.
Yes?
And you get on very well.
Yes.
Well, isn’t this perhaps<br/>a nice opportunity to
slip her one?
Spike, for God’s sake. She’s in trouble.
Just get a grip.
Right, you think it’s the wrong moment,<br/>fair enough.
Do you mind if I have a go?
-Spike!<br/>-Right, okay.
I’ll talk to you in the morning.
Okay. Might be too late, but okay.
[stairs creaking]
[exclaiming in disgust]
Please, sod off.
-Okay, sorry.<br/>-No.
No, no, no, wait,<br/>I thought you were someone else.
I thought you were Spike.<br/>I’m thrilled that you’re not.
Wow.
What?
Nothing.
It does strike me as, well, surreal<br/>that I’m allowed to see you naked.
You and every person in this country.
God, yeah, I’m sorry.
What is it about men and nudity, huh?<br/>Particularly breasts.
And how can you be so interested in them?
Well…
No, but seriously. They’re just breasts.
Every second person in the world has them.
Well, more than that, actually, when you<br/>think about it.
You know, Meatloaf has a very nice pair.
But they’re odd looking. They’re for milk.
Your mother has them.<br/>You’ve seen a thousand of them.
What’s all the fuss about?
Actually,<br/>I can’t think what it is, really.
Let me just have a quick look.
No, no, beats me.
Rita Hayworth used to say,
“They go to bed with Gilda,<br/>they wake up with me.”
Who was Gilda?
Her most famous part.
Men went to bed with the dream,
and they didn’t like it when<br/>they woke up with reality.
Do you feel that way?
You are lovelier this morning<br/>than you have ever been.
I’ll be right back.
Breakfast in bed.
Or it’s brunch, or lunch, or something.
My God.
Can I stay a bit longer?
Stay forever.
Okay.
I forgot the jam.
[door bell ringing]
I’ll get the jam,<br/>you get the door.
[sighing]
[reporters clamoring]
Jesus Christ.
What?
What is it?
Nothing, really.
You’re up to something.
Anna, no, please.
[crowd shouting]
Oh, my God.
And they got a picture<br/>of you dressed like that.
Yes.
Undressed like this, yeah.
Morning, darling ones.
It’s me. The press are here.<br/>No, there are hundreds of them.
My brilliant plan was not so brilliant.<br/>I know. I know. Just get over here.
Dammit.
I wouldn’t go outside.
Why not?
Just take my word for it.
[all clamoring]
How did I look?<br/>Not bad. Not at all bad.
Well-chosen briefs, I’d say.<br/>Chicks love gray.
Nice, firm buttocks.
How are you doing?
How do you think I’m doing?
I don’t know what happened.
Oh, I do.
Your furry friend thought he’d make a buck<br/>or two, telling the papers where I was.
-That’s not true.<br/>-Really?
The entire British press got<br/>up this morning and thought,
“I know where Anna Scott is.
She’s in that house with the<br/>blue door in Notting Hill.”
And then you go out<br/>in your goddamn underwear.
-I went out in my goddamn underwear, too.<br/>-Get out.
Yeah, I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry.
This is such an unbelievable mess.
I come to you to protect myself against<br/>more crappy gossip,
and now I’ve just landed<br/>in it all over again.
I mean, for God’s sake,<br/>I’ve got a boyfriend.
You have?
Well, as far as they’re<br/>concerned I do. Yes.
And now, tomorrow, there’ll be pictures
of you in every newspaper<br/>from here to Timbuktu.
I know that. But let’s stay calm.
-No, you can stay calm!<br/>-Right.
All right, this is a perfect<br/>situation for you, isn’t it?
Minimum input, maximum publicity.
Everywhere you go people will say, “Oh,<br/>well done. You slept with that actress.
We saw the pictures.”
That is spectacularly unfair.
Who knows, maybe it’ll even help business.
“Buy a boring book about Egypt<br/>from the guy that screwed Anna Scott.”
Now, stop. Stop.<br/>Stop, I beg you. Calm down.
Have a cup of tea.
I don’t want a<br/>goddamn cup of tea.
I just wanna go home.
[door bell ringing]
Spike, see who that is.<br/>And put some clothes on, for God’s sake.
Looks like a chauffeur to me.
Spike owes you an expensive<br/>dinner. Or holiday.
Depending if he’s got the brains to<br/>get the going rate on betrayal.
That is not true. Wait a minute.<br/>This is crazy behavior.
Can’t we just laugh<br/>about all this?
Seriously, in the huge sweep<br/>of things, this stuff doesn’t matter.
What he’s gonna say next<br/>is there’s people starving in the Sudan.
Well, there are. And we don’t have to go<br/>anywhere near that far.
My best friend slipped.
She slipped down stairs,<br/>cracked her back,
and she’s in a wheelchair<br/>for the rest of her life.
You know, all I’m asking for<br/>is a normal amount of perspective.
You’re right.<br/>Of course, you’re right.
It’s just that I’ve dealt with<br/>this garbage for 10 years.
You’ve had it for 10 minutes.<br/>Our perspectives are very different.
I mean, today’s newspapers will be lining<br/>tomorrow’s wastepaper bins.
Excuse me?
Well, you know,<br/>it’s just one day.
Tomorrow, today’s papers<br/>will all have been thrown out.
You really don’t get it.<br/>This story will be filed.
Every time anyone writes<br/>anything about me,
they’ll dig up these photos.
Newspapers last forever.<br/>I’ll regret this forever.
Right.
Right.
I will feel the opposite,<br/>if that’s okay by you.
And always be glad<br/>that you came to stay.
But…
You’re probably right.<br/>You’d better go.
[door bell ringing]
[crowd clamoring]
[cameras clicking]
Was it you?
I may have told a few<br/>people down the pub.
Right.
[“Ain’t No Sunshine” playing]
Have I got something for you.
Something which will<br/>make you love me so much,
you will want to hug me<br/>every day for the rest of my life.
Blimey, what is it?
Phone number of Anna Scott’s<br/>agent in London and her agent in New York.
Listen, you think about her<br/>all the time. Now you can ring her.
Yeah. Brilliant, thanks.
I’ll see you tonight.<br/>Hi, Marty. Sexy cardi.
[SHUSHING]
[GLASS TINKLING]
Hello. I have a little<br/>speech to make.
I won’t stand up because<br/>I can’t be bothered.
[laughing]
Exactly a year ago today,
this man here started the<br/>finest restaurant in London.
-Hear, hear.<br/>-Thank you very much.
Unfortunately, no one<br/>ever came to eat here.
It’s a tiny hiccough.
And so, we have to<br/>face the fact that
from next week, we must<br/>find somewhere new to eat.
I just want to say to Tony,<br/>don’t take it personally.
The more I think about things, the more<br/>I see no rhyme or reason in life.
No one knows why some things work out<br/>and some things don’t.
Why some of us get lucky,<br/>and some of us…
-Get fired.<br/>-What?
Yeah, well, it seems they’re<br/>shifting the whole outfit
much more towards<br/>the emerging markets.
And of course, well,<br/>I was total crap, so…
A toast to Bernie, the worst stockbroker<br/>in the whole world.
I thank you. And Tony,<br/>the worst restaurateur.
[William] Tony and Bernie.<br/>Both crap.
[Bella] The terrible two.
In their own special ways.
Since it’s an evening of announcements,<br/>I’ve also got one.
I’ve decided to get engaged.
I’ve found myself a nice,<br/>slightly odd-looking bloke.
Who I know is gonna make me<br/>happy for the rest of my life.
Well, wait a sec. I mean…
I’m your brother. I don’t<br/>know anything about this.
Is he… I don’t know,<br/>is he financially viable?
[chuckling]
He’s an artist with<br/>brilliant prospects.
This is a secret you’ve<br/>been keeping from me?
[Bella] No. No. I swear.
By the way, it’s you.
Me?
What do you think?
Well, yeah.
Groovy.
Excuse me, are there<br/>any more announcements?
Well, actually, yes.
I feel I should apologize to everyone<br/>for my behavior over the last six months.
I have, as you know, been<br/>somewhat down in the mouth.
Well, there’s an understatement.<br/>There are dead people on better form.
But I just wish to make it clear<br/>that I’ve turned a corner,
and henceforward intend<br/>to be impressively happy.
[piano playing]
[singing “Blue Moon”]
Oh, God, I’m horribly drunk.
Me, too.
Come here.
So you’ve laid the ghost?
I believe I have.
Don’t give a damn<br/>about the famous girl?
No. No, I don’t think I do.
Which means you won’t be distracted<br/>by the fact that she’s back in London,
grasping her Oscar,
and currently to be found filming,<br/>most days, on Hampstead Heath.
Oh, God, no.
So, not over her, in fact.
[man laughing]
-Can I help you?<br/>-Yeah.
I’m looking for Anna Scott.
Does she know you’re coming?
No.
No, she doesn’t.
I’m afraid I can’t<br/>let you through, sir.
Right. I mean, I am actually<br/>a friend. I’m not a lunatic.
But no, you basically…
Can’t let you through, sir.
Well, this is…
I only found out<br/>you were here yesterday.
Well, I was going to call,<br/>but I…
[woman] Anna.
Yes.
Things aren’t going very well<br/>and it’s our last day.
Absolutely, yeah,<br/>you’re clearly very busy.
But if you could wait,<br/>there are things to say.
Okay.
Drink tea.<br/>There’s lots of tea.
Come and have a look.
Are you a fan of Henry James?
This is a Henry James film?
Yeah.
This is Harry.
He’ll give you a pair of headphones,<br/>so you can hear the dialogue.
-Thank you very much.<br/>-No problem.
Hi.
Hi, here we go.<br/>Volume’s on the side.
There. Have a seat.
Thank you.
[man] We are living in cloud cuckoo land. <br/>We’ll never get this done today.
[Anna] Well, we’ve got to. I have to <br/>be in New York on Thursday.
Stop showing off.
God, that’s an enormous arse.
[Anna] I’m not listening.
No, but seriously,<br/>it’s not fair.
So many tragic young<br/>teenagers with anorexia,
and that girl has an arse<br/>she could perfectly well share around
with at least 10 other women,<br/>and still be big bottomed.
I would think, looking at<br/>something nice like that,
you and your bony<br/>little excuse for an arse
would be well advised to keep quiet.
Now, down to business,<br/>the end of the scene.
I ask you when you’re telling<br/>everyone, and you say…
“Tomorrow will be soon enough.”
And then I… Right, okay.
So who was that rather diffident chap<br/>I saw you talking to round the back?
No one.
Just some guy from the past.
It’s a bit of an awkward situation really.
I don’t know what he’s doing here.
Of course.
[sighing]
Thanks, I’ve got to…
Any time.
[man] Ladies and gentlemen,
can we have you all on your<br/>first marks, please.
On your first marks.
I do hate to disturb you whilst<br/>you’re cooking the books,
but there’s<br/>a delivery for you.
Martin, really,<br/>can’t you just do it yourself?
But you see, this is not for the shop.<br/>This is for you.
Right, okay.
Now tell me, if I employed a wet rag,
would I have to pay it<br/>as much as I pay you?
Hi.
Hello.
You disappeared.
Yeah. Yeah, I had to leave.
I didn’t want to disturb.
How have you been?
Fine. Fine.
I don’t know, everything<br/>much the same, you know.
When they change the law,<br/>Spike and I will marry immediately.
Whereas you, I’ve watched<br/>in wonder. Awards, glory.
Oh, no, it’s all nonsense,<br/>believe me.
I’d no idea how much<br/>nonsense it was, but nonsense it all is.
Well, yesterday was<br/>our last day of filming,
so I’m leaving.
But…
I brought this for you from home.<br/>So I thought I’d give it to you.
Thank you.
-Shall I…<br/>-Oh, no, don’t open it now,
I’ll be embarrassed.
Well, thank you. I don’t know<br/>what it’s for, but thanks anyway.
I actually had it in my apartment.<br/>I thought you…
But when it came to it,
I didn’t know how to call,<br/>having behaved so badly.
Twice.
So it’s just been<br/>sitting in the hotel.
Then you came,<br/>and I figured…
The thing is…
The thing is…
What? What is the thing?
Don’t even think about it.<br/>Go away, immediately. Go away.
Right. Sorry.
You were saying?
Yes.
I have to go away today,<br/>but I wondered if I didn’t,
whether you might<br/>let me see you a little,
or a lot, maybe.
See if you could<br/>like me again.
But yesterday that actor<br/>asked you who I was
and you just dismissed<br/>me out of hand.
I heard.
You had a microphone,<br/>I had headphones.
What, you expect me to tell<br/>the truth about my life
to the most indiscreet<br/>man in England?
Excuse me. It’s your<br/>mother on the phone.
Will you tell her I’ll<br/>ring her back, please?
I’ve actually tried that tack,<br/>but she said you’ve said that once before,
and it’s now been<br/>about 24 hours
and the foot that was purple is now<br/>sort of blackish in color and…
Right, right, yeah.<br/>Perfect timing as ever.
Martin,<br/>hold the fort a second.
Yes, all right.
[Martin stuttering]
Could I just say, I thought Ghost was<br/>the most wonderful film.
Is that right?
Oh, yes.
I’ve always wondered what<br/>Patrick Swayze’s like in real life.
I can’t say that I know<br/>Patrick all that well.
What, he wasn’t that<br/>friendly during filming?
Well, I’m sure he was friendly to<br/>Demi Moore who acted with him in Ghost.
Oh, right. Sorry.
Right. Always been<br/>a bit of an ass.
Anyway, well,<br/>it was lovely to meet you.
I’m a huge fan of yours.<br/>And Demi’s of course.
Sorry about that.
That’s fine.
There’s always a pause when the jury<br/>goes out to consider their verdict.
Anna, look…
I’m a fairly level-headed bloke.
Not often in and out of love. But…
Can I just say “no” to your kind request,<br/>and leave it at that?
Yes.
Fine. Of course, I…
Of course.
Well, I’ll just be going, then.<br/>It was nice to see you.
The thing is, with you I’m in real danger.
It seems like a perfect situation,<br/>apart from that foul temper of yours.
But my relatively inexperienced heart
would, I fear, not recover
if I was once again cast aside,<br/>as I would absolutely expect to be.
There are just too many<br/>pictures of you, too many films.
You know, you’d go,<br/>and I’d be well-buggered, basically.
That really is a real “no,” isn’t it?
I live in Notting Hill.<br/>You live in Beverly Hills.
Everyone in the world<br/>knows who you are.
My mother has trouble<br/>remembering my name.
Fine.
Fine. Good decision.
Good decision.
The fame thing isn’t<br/>really real, you know.
And don’t forget,
I’m also just a girl<br/>standing in front of a boy,
asking him to love her.
Bye.
So, what do you think?<br/>Good move?
[Honey] Yeah, good move.
I mean, when all’s said and done,<br/>she’s nothing special.
I saw her taking<br/>her trousers down
and I definitely glimpsed<br/>some cellulite down there.
Good decision, yeah.<br/>All actresses are as mad as snakes.
Tones, what do you reckon?
Never met her, never want to.
Brilliant. Max?
Absolutely.<br/>Never trust a vegetarian.
Great. Thanks. Brilliant.
I was called and I came.<br/>What’s up?
William’s just turned<br/>down Anna Scott.
You daft prick.
No, no. No, no,<br/>it’s actually quite sensible.
That painting, isn’t the original, is it?
You know, I think it might be, yeah.
But she said she wanted<br/>to go out with you?
Yeah.
Well, that’s nice.
What?
Well, you know,
anyone saying they wanna go out with you<br/>is pretty great, isn’t it?
It was sort of sweet, actually.
I mean, I know she’s an actress<br/>and all that, so she can deliver a line,
but she said she might be<br/>as famous as she can be,
but also that she was just a girl,
standing in front of a boy,
asking him to love her.
Oh, sod a dog. I’ve made<br/>the wrong decision, haven’t I?
Max, how fast is your car?
[honking]
[tires screeching]
Good luck.
If anyone gets in our way,<br/>we have small nuclear devices.
-Where to?<br/>-The Ritz. All I can think is The Ritz.
-Where’s Bella?<br/>-She’s not coming.
-Oh, sod that.<br/>-What?
Bernie, sit in the back.
[“Gimme Some Lovin'” playing]
Max, I’m okay.
Come on, baby.
Mind your back.
[tires screeching]
[Bella] Which way are you going?
[Max] Down Kensington, Church Street,
-then Knightsbridge, then Hyde Park Corner<br/>-No, no, crazy. Crazy.
-Go along Bayswater.<br/>-That’s right. Then Park Lane.
No. No. Straight down to the<br/>Cromwell Road, then left.
No!
[tires screeching]
Stop right there! I will<br/>decide the route. All right?
[Bernie] Sorry, Max.
James Bond never has to put up<br/>with this sort of shit.
[tires screeching]
-[Bella] Turn right. Turn right!<br/>-[Max] I can’t, it’s one way.
[Bella] Well, do a U-turn.
[Max] Oh, sod it.
Hold on!
[cars honking]
[William] Brilliant!
[laughing]
Bloody hell, this is fun.
Hi. Is Miss Scott staying here?
No, sir.
How about Miss Flintstone?
No, sir.
Bambi?
No, sir.
Or, I don’t know,<br/>Beavis or Butt-head?
No, sir.
Thanks. Thanks.
There was a Miss Pocahontas,<br/>but she checked out about an hour ago.
I believe she’s holding a press conference<br/>at the Savoy, before flying to America.
We have lift off.
You have message for Takiama?
I’ll just check, sir.
Bugger this for<br/>a bunch of bananas.
[honking]
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Go. Go.
Hang on. Come on. Wait there!<br/>Come on, come on! Wait!
Go on, go, go, go!
You’re my hero!
Down, boy.
[tires screeching]
Go!
-Excuse me.<br/>-Yes, sir?
Where’s the press conference, please?
Are you an accredited member of the press?
Yeah.
There you go.
Yes, that’s a Blockbuster<br/>Video membership card, sir.
That’s right. I work for<br/>their in-house magazine.
Movies Are Our Business.
I’m sorry, sir.
He’s with me.
And you are?
Writing an article on how London hotels<br/>treat people in wheelchairs.
Yes, of course, madam.
It’s in the Lancaster Room,<br/>though I’m afraid you’re rather late.
Run!

 

[man 1] Does this mean that Miss Scott
will not be publicizing her next film?
그럼 스콧 씨가 다음 작품을 밝히지 않겠다는 건가요?

No, it absolutely does not mean that.
아니, 절대 그런 게 아닙니다

She’ll be abiding by all
her present commitments.
지금의 약속은 모두 지킬 겁니다

She just won’t be making
anymore for the next year.
다음 해에
영화를 하지 않겠다는 거죠

[man 2] When will the
film be released?
영화는 언제 개봉되나요?

At the moment, the plan is to
release in America towards
the end of the autumn,
미국에서는 늦가을에 개봉하고

and over here, around Christmas,
or early in the New Year.
여기는 크리스마스 때나
신년 초에 개봉할 계획입니다

Right! Dominic.
네, 도미니크

Anna, how much longer are
you staying in the UK, then?
애나, 영국에는
얼마나 더 있을 건가요?

No time at all.
I leave tonight.
오늘 밤에 떠납니다

Which is why we have to round
things up now, so final questions, please.
그래서 지금 정리하는 겁니다
이제 마지막 질문입니다

Yes, lady there.
거기 여자분

Is your decision to take a year off
anything to do with the rumors about Jeff
1년간 쉬겠다는 결정이
제프와 공연하는 여배우에 대한

and his present leading lady?
루머와 관련 있나요?

Absolutely not.
절대 아닙니다

Do you believe the rumors?
그 루머를 믿나요?

Well, it’s really
not my business anymore.
이젠 나와 관계없는 일이지만

Though, I will say, from my experience,
rumors about Jeff do tend to be true.
제 경험상 제프의 루머는 사실일 것 같네요

[all chuckling]

Yeah.

The last time you were here, there
were some fairly graphic photographs
지난번에 영국에 왔을 때
젊은 영국인 남자와

taken of you with a young English guy.
멋진 사진을 찍었죠

So, what happened there?
그건 어떻게 된 건가요?

He was just a friend.
We’re still friends, I think.
그냥 친구예요
아직도 친구일 거예요

Right. Yes, gentleman
in the pink shirt.
자, 분홍색 셔츠 입은 분

Yes.

Miss Scott, are there any
circumstances in which
스콧 씨
혹시 그 두 사람이

the two of you might be
more than just good friends?
좋은 친구 이상일 수도 있습니까?

I hoped there would be, but no,
I’m assured there aren’t.
그러길 바랐는데
그렇게 되지 않을 것 같아요

But what would you say if…
하지만 만약에

I’m sorry, just the one question, please.
미안하지만, 질문은 하나입니다

No, it’s all right.
You were saying?
괜찮아요, 계속하세요

I was just wondering if it
turned out that this person…
제가 궁금한 것
만약 그 사람이…

Thacker. His name’s Thacker.
그 사람 이름이 새커예요

Thanks. Thanks.
고마워요

I just wondered whether
if Mr. Thacker realized
만약에 새커 씨 자신이

he’d been a daft prick…
개멍청이였음을 깨닫고

[crowd exclaiming]

…and got down on his knees
and begged you to reconsider,
무릎을 꿇고
재고해 달라고 하면

whether you would,
in fact, then reconsider?
재고하실 건가요?

Yes, I believe I would.
예, 그럴 거예요

That’s very good news.
아주 좋은 뉴스군요

The readers of Horse & Hound
will be absolutely delighted.
‘말과 사냥개’ 독자들이 아주 좋아할 겁니다

[all laughing]

[inaudible conversation]

Right, Dominic, if you’d like
to ask your question again?
자, 도미니크
아까 질문을 다시 하시겠어요?

Yeah.
그러죠

Anna, how long are you
intending to stay here in Britain?
애나, 영국에
얼마나 있을 거예요?

Indefinitely.
무기한이에요

[crowd chattering]

[“She” playing]

What happened?
어떻게 됐어?

It was good.
잘 됐어

Are you gonna get married?
두 분 결혼할 건가요?

[crowd cheering]

[“You’ve Got A Way” playing]

[“No Matter What” playing]